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View Full Version : New Jersey Members : EXCUSES THREAD


chanduv23
10-21-2007, 04:21 PM
This thread is exclusively for all the New Jersey members who, in the past have given excuses for participating in local activities or turned down IVs requests or have always been eluding IV at times of need by giving some excuse or the other all the time.

When we did a meet in Manhattan - a lot of members reached out to us and told us - if it was in New Jersey on a weekend we would all have made it. Now we see all these people are silent when we have done what they wanted us to do.

Please post all your excuses on this thread. This really helps us. We are reaching your doorstep and asking you all to step up and everytime we try to reach you, we get some excuse or the other.

Eluding reality is no bravery, to achieve something we must stand up and lift our head high and move forward. We cannot expect our issues to be resolved if we don't step up and show support.

Please post all your excuses in this thread. Existing hard working members are doing everything to motivate others to step up and we would all like to know what your problems are.

So please post all your excuses on this thread. We will try to reach you and see in what possible ways we can help.

singhsa3
10-21-2007, 05:40 PM
Well, if people are not coming forward, I will give them some choices
a) Dog ran away
b) Spouse is an anti-immigrant
c) Need to take permission from parents
d) Consider my fellow people in the same boat as below my standard.
e) In USCIS we trust.
f) I will rather apporach Manmohan Singh
g) etc etc
This thread is exclusively for all the New Jersey members who, in the past have given excuses for participating in local activities or turned down IVs requests or have always been eluding IV at times of need by giving some excuse or the other all the time.

When we did a meet in Manhattan - a lot of members reached out to us and told us - if it was in New Jersey on a weekend we would all have made it. Now we see all these people are silent when we have done what they wanted us to do.

Please post all your excuses on this thread. This really helps us. We are reaching your doorstep and asking you all to step up and everytime we try to reach you, we get some excuse or the other.

Eluding reality is no bravery, to achieve something we must stand up and lift our head high and move forward. We cannot expect our issues to be resolved if we don't step up and show support.

Please post all your excuses in this thread. Existing hard working members are doing everything to motivate others to step up and we would all like to know what your problems are.

So please post all your excuses on this thread. We will try to reach you and see in what possible ways we can help.

santb1975
10-21-2007, 05:45 PM
What can all of us do together so that we get participication in IV events. Please share your concerns/ comments. We can resolve our issues only if we work together as a Team.

I belong to the So. Cal chapter and a lot of us in our group spend atleast half a day in our weekend to increase awareness about our issues. We take pride in working for ourselves. I am sure the Tri-State chapter is working towards our goals diligently as well.

santb1975
10-21-2007, 05:47 PM
However let's approach everyone to participate with a carrot than with a stick :D

chanduv23
10-21-2007, 05:49 PM
Some more excuses

(1) Wife is sick
(2) Daughter is sick
(3) I am travelling exactly on that day
(4) I don't care for GC, I will go back to my hoime country - I am browsing IV only to track my reciepts
(5) I have something very very important on that day

....
....

Come on New Jersey members, we want to hear more excuses. Come on folks, we need excuses here. Please post all your excuses here.

chanduv23
10-21-2007, 06:01 PM
However let's approach everyone to participate with a carrot than with a stick :D

Thanks sant. Carrots are always there, a lot of these people have been elusive by giving the silliest of excuses. They get on these forums and give all sorts of suggestions and blame IV leadership.

We have done this meet based on the feedback from all NJ folks that the majority of IV tri state folks sre from NJ and it makes sense to do events in NJ rather than NY. Now we take IV right to their door step and now, all those who suggested NJ on a weekend, are no where to be seen now, the same people who attended the NY meet are coming for the NJ meet aalso, driving all the way from their places.

We just want to find out from people what their excuses are, so that we can better help them. IV is our organization and it is our responsibility.

There is a huge membership base in NJ area and everyone MUST get active. This is intended.

wait4ever
10-21-2007, 08:09 PM
Well, if people are not coming forward, I will give them some choices
a) Dog ran away
b) Spouse is an anti-immigrant
c) Need to take permission from parents
d) Consider my fellow people in the same boat as below my standard.
e) In USCIS we trust.
f) I will rather apporach Manmohan Singh
g) etc etc

singhsa3 - i really liked

F) I will rather approach Manmohan singh - Consider this my excuse- it is a real gem.

HOWEVER - (E) can never be a thought that can cross any sane persons mind !!

See you all at the meet

chanduv23
10-21-2007, 08:11 PM
singhsa3 - i really liked

F) I will rather approach Manmohan singh - Consider this my excuse- it is a real gem.

HOWEVER - (E) can never be a thought that can cross any sane persons mind !!

See you all at the meet

This thread seems to be hijacked by genuine folks who are doing IV stuff. This thread was intended for the "Lame excuses" folks.

njboy
10-21-2007, 08:22 PM
chanduv..i wrote in the poll...see u there

njboy
10-21-2007, 08:24 PM
dog ate the print out of my directions to ymca

chanduv23
10-21-2007, 08:26 PM
chanduv..i wrote in the poll...see u there

Thanks njboy - once again this thread is only for those who have excuses and not for folks like you :)

Let us leave this thread for folks who can record their excuses :)

pappu
10-21-2007, 09:29 PM
Top 10 Excuses:

1) There are already 24k+ members. One less member not active will not hurt
2) Would rather stay on tracker threads that day. I Would rather check my LUDs update over the weekend and wait for my GC in the mail
3) I am already a registered member of IV using the free registration. I have so many posts already. Isn't that enough contribution from me?
4) Would rather spend time for Amway/Quickstar
5) It costs money to travel. Gas prices are also high.
6) I am expensive. I want at least $150 /hr of my time.
7) Bring some film actor to the meeting and I will come to take the autograph
8) I only care for my greencard and not for others. Once I get mine, I will shut the door behind me.
9) I have a tail and its between my legs
10) I already have top 9 excuses above, so why should I come.

chanduv23
10-21-2007, 09:34 PM
Top 10 Excuses:

1) There are already 24k+ members. One less member not active will not hurt
2) Would rather stay on tracker threads that day. I Would rather check my LUDs update over the weekend and wait for my GC in the mail
3) I am already a registered member of IV using the free registration. I have so many posts already. Isn't that enough contribution from me?
4) Would rather spend time for Amway/Quickstar
5) It costs money to travel. Gas prices are also high.
6) I am expensive. I want at least $150 /hr of my time.
7) Bring some film actor to the meeting and I will come to take the autograph
8) I only care for my greencard and not for others. Once I get mine, I will shut the door behind me.
9) I have a tail and its between my legs
10) I already have top 9 excuses above, so why should I come.

When we want those people who give excuses to write on this thread, we see all the hard working, genuine people including most dedicated IV core folks like pappu on this thread.

We want all those elusive types of folks who are always ready with excuses to post on this thread and not the highly regarded folks like pappu or others who have been posting here.

Come on folks, we need to see all your excuses. This will help us learn a lot of things, please help us by posting your excuses here.

eb3_nepa
10-21-2007, 10:38 PM
DO you guys really believe that ppl who wont come to the NJ IV event will actually come forward and give an excuse in this thread?

chanduv23
10-21-2007, 10:42 PM
DO you guys really believe that ppl who wont come to the NJ IV event will actually come forward and give an excuse in this thread?

We want them to, we want to know what the excuses are. We are holding this conference exclusively for New Jersey members and we want everyone to make it to the meeting, but we would also like to know what excuses people have if they don't make it.

It helps us and helps IV to plan things in future.

optimystic
10-21-2007, 11:18 PM
Chandu & others

You can't expect people to come forward and provide 'excuses' without being apprehensive about causing flaming wars/getting red dots, being *cyberabused*.

If I were genuinely interested in trying to reach out to people, as a starter I would have not used the word 'excuses'. Probably ask people via polls, or ask for 'difficulties'/'obstacles' that they are facing that prevent them from attending the events. Ask for 'motivations'/'conveniences' that will help get their involvement more. May be some people might prefer to contact/be in touch via teleconferences only...While that may not be enough...its a start.

You can't attract un-motivated people by being sarcastic/confrontational. That would alienate them further. They wouldn't even bother listening to you and may even retort back (like the posts which mentioned that some IV volunteers were rudely treated/cutoff when trying to reach people over phone for DC rally participation etc) .

Kind of like the Amway backlash (posters mentioned in some other threads that they would wear t-shirts broadcasting their intention 'if you are Amway get out of my way' or something like that :) ) . Please don't mistake my example. I am NOT AT ALL comparing IV is in any micro/nano way to be similar to Amway nor do I work for Amway . I am just giving an example of how people are capable of blocking out something outright when they are uninterested/not motivated/don't care.

You got to try to understand their motivations and show the right carrots. You may still not get the expected rate of converts to IV or the local chapters, but you are atleast not alienating them further!

Just my 2c.

And as for my 'obstacles'

1) Simply time, health, new addition to family, location and ofcourse the universal motivation of one and all - money.

And btw, I am not a receipt tracker. Nor an active participant in IV stuff or forums. Did not contribute anything to IV so far. Just a casual observer. And wanted to be honest upfront.

optimystic
10-21-2007, 11:24 PM
Chandu & others

You can't expect people to come forward and provide 'excuses' without being apprehensive about causing flaming wars/getting red dots, being *cyberabused*.

If I were genuinely interested in trying to reach out to people, as a starter I would have not used the word 'excuses'. Probably ask people via polls, or ask for 'difficulties'/'obstacles' that they are facing that prevent them from attending the events. Ask for 'motivations'/'conveniences' that will help get their involvement more. May be some people might prefer to contact/be in touch via teleconferences only...While that may not be enough...its a start.

You can't attract un-motivated people by being sarcastic/confrontational. That would alienate them further. They wouldn't even bother listening to you and may even retort back (like the posts which mentioned that some IV volunteers were rudely treated/cutoff when trying to reach people over phone for DC rally participation etc) .

Kind of like the Amway backlash (posters mentioned in some other threads that they would wear t-shirts broadcasting their intention 'if you are Amway get out of my way' or something like that :) ) . Please don't mistake my example. I am NOT AT ALL comparing IV is in any micro/nano way to be similar to Amway nor do I work for Amway . I am just giving an example of how people are capable of blocking out something outright when they are uninterested/not motivated/don't care.

You got to try to understand their motivations and show the right carrots. You may still not get the expected rate of converts to IV or the local chapters, but you are atleast not alienating them further!

Just my 2c.

And as for my 'obstacles'

1) Simply time, health, new addition to family, location and ofcourse the universal motivation of one and all - money.

And btw, I am not a receipt tracker. Nor an active participant in IV stuff or forums. Did not contribute anything to IV so far. Just a casual observer. And wanted to be honest upfront.


And I am not even from anywhere near east coast. So may be I should not have commented on this thread at all :) . Oh , well hope you guys dont mind some random ramblings.

paskal
10-21-2007, 11:44 PM
thoughtful posts are always welcome.
hope we can involve you more in the future. many things can be done without too much time or disruption to your life...we all started like you though...everyone finds their place/motivation etc over time. and that is probably not a bad thing in itself :)

chanduv23
10-22-2007, 12:10 AM
Chandu & others

You can't expect people to come forward and provide 'excuses' without being apprehensive about causing flaming wars/getting red dots, being *cyberabused*.

If I were genuinely interested in trying to reach out to people, as a starter I would have not used the word 'excuses'. Probably ask people via polls, or ask for 'difficulties'/'obstacles' that they are facing that prevent them from attending the events. Ask for 'motivations'/'conveniences' that will help get their involvement more. May be some people might prefer to contact/be in touch via teleconferences only...While that may not be enough...its a start.

You can't attract un-motivated people by being sarcastic/confrontational. That would alienate them further. They wouldn't even bother listening to you and may even retort back (like the posts which mentioned that some IV volunteers were rudely treated/cutoff when trying to reach people over phone for DC rally participation etc) .

Kind of like the Amway backlash (posters mentioned in some other threads that they would wear t-shirts broadcasting their intention 'if you are Amway get out of my way' or something like that :) ) . Please don't mistake my example. I am NOT AT ALL comparing IV is in any micro/nano way to be similar to Amway nor do I work for Amway . I am just giving an example of how people are capable of blocking out something outright when they are uninterested/not motivated/don't care.

You got to try to understand their motivations and show the right carrots. You may still not get the expected rate of converts to IV or the local chapters, but you are atleast not alienating them further!

Just my 2c.

And as for my 'obstacles'

1) Simply time, health, new addition to family, location and ofcourse the universal motivation of one and all - money.

And btw, I am not a receipt tracker. Nor an active participant in IV stuff or forums. Did not contribute anything to IV so far. Just a casual observer. And wanted to be honest upfront.

Thanks for your humble opinion. This helps us. When I first joined IV, I used to be an observer, then started participating, I learnt that IV is an action oriented group and we must do something, I did this ONLY looking at people who are doing so much for us, I did take a back seat initially when I was approached for more active involvement, the main reason was my lifestyle - both of us work, wife is carrying, I travel from NY to NJ everyday and am pounded with work, then I changed my mind and started getting active. Once I did that, I started balancing other stuff and IV then became a part of my "regular agenda", I started liking the folks behind IV and their selfless help and their pro bono work (all this involves brains and hard work and skills and trust).

IV is a voluntary organization and it is entirely upto people to join or not or contribute or do something.

The main reason we started this thread was because, over a period of time we used to get feedback from various people that we must have meetings in New Jersey. We did exactly what people asked us to do. Now, a lot of those who recomended this to us are nowhere to be seen.

You may not know how free riders can mislead the organization. IV is a self help organization and we are not AMMWAY or QUICKSTAR, everyone here joins IV to help themselves. State Chapters is a very important strategical move, and mobilizing State chapters will be a key to IV success. IV represents us all and we are all IV. Elusive people have given and are still giving us all a tough time by misleading us. For eg.. if someone does not want to come to a meeting, he/she need not say "If the meeting was in NJ I would have come, why do you have it in NY?" This misleads us. For the sake of these majority folks who find it difficult to make it to NY, we do one in NJ just for their convinience and now you see these people cannot make this excuse and come up with a different excuse.

Some members told us that we must do a meet in Long Island, and when I am trying to reach the same folks or others in Long Island, they are backing off giving some other reason.

If people do not want to come to meetings they can say "We are not interested", they can be honest. They need not be non communicative and elusive. Such traits are not good for grassroots efforts and will mislead us badly in trying to achieve the organizational goals. These are the kind of folks that make it easy for anti immigrants like Lou Dobbs to make false stories about us and present a wrong perception about us.

chanduv23
10-22-2007, 12:35 AM
Chandu & others

You can't attract un-motivated people by being sarcastic/confrontational. That would alienate them further. They wouldn't even bother listening to you and may even retort back (like the posts which mentioned that some IV volunteers were rudely treated/cutoff when trying to reach people over phone for DC rally participation etc) .



This is not true. I have been in IV since may 2006 and I have noticed a lot of unmotivated folks who changed their stance.

The people who retort back do log onto IV and discuss stuff here. IV represents us all and it is in us, by trying to elude from us by giving silly excuses or by being rude or by alienating does not help them at all. These people want to ride freely on us. They hamper all the efforts IV is doing for them. They lurk on these forums anonymously and run away when approached to do something. What are we asking them to do? We are asking them to help themselves and nothing else.

Sometime back, I was talking about the rally to some folks and they just did not care about it, then I started motivating them and they would change the topic and not talk about it, then one day I spoke a bit aggressively and then they told me "We understand and would like to do something, but we are just not sure how we can help, then I told them they can spread message through flyers and emails and they did it" - some amount of aggression is needed with the kind of community we are dealing with.

We are not selling soaps or shampoo, we are asking people to stand up for themselves, they need not be rude or elusive. it is their duty. Why did people scramble durring the July visa fiasco? Why did IV had so many people logging on during the fiasco?

We can definitely baby sit people and change their diapers and also console them when they cry and also take it when they scold us.